Combine all ingredients in a medium saucepan over low heat. Bring to a simmer and continue simmering for 20 minutes, stirring often.
Keep sauce warm until ready to use.
For the wings
Pre-heat oven to 350 F. Lightly spray a baking sheet with non-stick spray.
Pre-heat oil in a deep fryer or Dutch oven to 350 F.
In a medium bowl, combine the flour, salt and pepper.
Place the buttermilk in a separate bowl.
Coat the wings in the flour mixture. Shake off any excess and transfer to the buttermilk.
Coat the wings in the buttermilk. Shake off any excess then return to the flour mixture.
Shake off any excess flour. Working in batches if needed, fry the wings 10-12 minutes or until golden brown. Remove to a paper towel-lined plate to drain.
Brush the wings with the BBQ sauce. You can also gently toss the wings in the sauce, but I prefer to brush the sauce onto the wings.
Place wings on the baking sheet and place in the oven for 10 minutes to 'set' the sauce.